Hypercritical
WWDC 2007 keynote bingo
My God, it’s full of squares.
It’s that time again. For a refresher course on keynote bingo, see the explanation accompanying the Macworld 2007 bingo card. For WWDC 2007, it’s the same deal: one card, no easy wins. As usual, some unmarked squares from past cards have been carried over. Hope springs eternal.
There are a few notable absences this time. Most glaringly, there’s nothing about the iPod or iTunes. I just couldn’t think of anything related to those two products that’s both exciting and remotely likely to be announced at WWDC. HD content or something in the iTunes store, maybe, but that’s pretty boring. And I just can’t imagine the inevitable OS X-based iPods being announced until after the iPhone launches.
ZFS only gets its traditional “mention” square (which has yet to be checked) rather than the expected “ZFS replaces HFS+” or “Leopard boots from ZFS” squares. If either of those things happens, you can check the “ZFS mentioned” square anyway, but I’m hedging my bets on any sweeping ZFS integration. Of course, as with the OS X iPods and Leopard booting ZFS, I’ll be happy to be proven wrong.
The official card is in PDF format, as usual:
Finally, a refresher on the rules. If you’re going to the keynote in person, print out the bingo card and play along live. The first person in the audience to win the game is expected to yell “BINGO!” loud enough so that the rest of us can hear it when we watch the keynote webcast video later. If we can’t actually hear you, it’s also acceptable if Steve Jobs hears you on stage and indicates this in some way…perhaps, by having you thrown out or “disappeared.” Hey, no guts, no glory!
The requirements for each square are listed below. Good luck!
Bingo card created by John McCoy
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.Mac overhauled - The .Mac service is presented as significantly improved. Whether or not it’s actually improved doesn’t matter; it’s just the presentation that counts. You can also mark this box is .Mac is retired, renamed, or otherwise nuked.
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Bertrand, baby - Bertrand Serlet is either the first non-Steve, non-iPhone-related presenter, or he has the most time on stage of any Apple employee other than Jobs.
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Leopard secrets revealed - As far as we can tell, all of Leopard’s "top secret" features are revealed.
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iLife - A new version of iLife is announced.
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Leopard is the star - Though many other things are discussed, the majority of the time in the keynote is spent on Leopard. I know this square seems like a gimmie, but remember how much Jobs likes to talk about the iPhone… (and see later squares about iPhone development).
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VoIP or iChat on iPhone - VoIP, iChat, or any other form of voice or text-based communication that uses the iPhone’s WiFi connection.
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Virtualization in Leopard - Any virtualization features built into Leopard. This includes the ability to run any other foreign OS within Leopard, including other versions of Mac OS or Mac OS X.
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“New” Finder in Leopard - A substantially altered Finder appears in Leopard. As always, the quotes around “new” are there to indicate my pessimism that it’ll actually be all that new. But if it is called “new” or presented it as a big change, you can mark this square.
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iPhone Widgets - The announcement of any WebKit-based iPhone development environment open to third-party developers (even if the resulting applications are not called “widgets”).
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Illuminous - The word “illuminous” is spoken or appears on any slide.
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iPhone Leopard demo - The integration of the iPhone with Leopard is demonstrated.
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New look in Leopard - Mac OS X Leopard includes significant changes to the look of the standards elements of the UI (windows, buttons, scroll-bars, etc.)
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MacBook Thin - A new laptop Mac that’s smaller than any existing MacBook or MacBook Pro.
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iPhone SDK - The announcement of a full-fledged iPhone SDK. As with the iPhone Widgets square, it’s only the announcement that matters, not the date that it will actually be available.
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New desktop Mac (not Mac Pro) - A new desktop Mac product that is not a Mac Pro. (New iMacs count.)
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Vista ridiculed - Windows Vista is ridiculed (though it need not be mentioned directly by name).
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ZFS mentioned - ZFS is mentioned by a presenter. Text on a slide does not count. The presenter must say it.
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Universal MS Office demo - Any demonstration of a Universal binary build of any part of Microsoft Office. I’ll accept something less than a full-blown demo (e.g., just some screenshots or a marketing spiel) if you need this square to win, but it has to be delivered by a Microsoft representative.
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“One more thing…” - When Steve Jobs says there’s “one more thing.” A slide containing the phrase is also acceptable, even if Jobs does not actually say it.
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“Boom” - Steve Jobs says the word “boom” while demonstrating something.
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Leopard release date - The exact day that Mac OS X Leopard will be released.
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Leopard != $129 - Mac OS X Leopard single-user price is not $129. (Note: “client” Mac OS X, not Mac OS X Server.)
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Leopard secrets remain - Jobs announces that one or more of Leopard’s "top secret" features will remain secret a while longer.
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New displays with cameras - New Apple displays with built-in or otherwise attached cameras.
This article originally appeared at Ars Technica. It is reproduced here with permission.